Dreams and Reality, continued.

Our second writer is Chris Johansson who is currently living and working in Portland. Chris is a graduate of the Lane Community College multimedia program and a former Proscenia Intern.

"I listened to an episode of "This American Life" on NPR last winter while working at the Mt Hood Meadows ski resort. It focused on this same question, how did your early dreams and the reality of your life compare? Did you find the job you wanted? Are you living in your own house, with your dog and 2.5 kids at the age you envisioned? And other such questions.

The lecturer, featured on the program, asked how many people were working at the job they had dreamed about. Out of the crowd of over one hundred, one person raised his hand.

I wondered how many of these people saw themselves as failures or were unhappy because of their choices? How many had given up their dreams to pursue whatever else had come along? And how many of them had found something new that was equally good as their dream? People obviously move on, but how? Do you shape your reality or does reality shape you?

I still haven’t figured out if knowing what you want to do early-on is a good thing or not. I made up my mind by the second year of high school. Over the next six years, as I finished school and went on to college to get a degree in multimedia, I was working toward a dream and the expectations that came with it.

I completed my education and training before a lot of people my age had started.But what if my advanced start didn't pay off? Was it worth building up my expectations just to get them shattered?Why didn't anyone tell me that a lot of people don’t end up doing as they thought they would?

There seems to be some pressure and expectations, from family and society,for one to be successful right after graduation. Add to this one's own personal anxiety and even the happiest person may be looking for Prozac.It takes a lot of courage to remain focused.

I can imagine that for some graduates, not realizing their dreams could be very difficult to handle. It’s like someone saying you’re not good enough, or that the time you spent learning was a waste.

Many people will end up changing professions throughout life. Some may do something entirely different out of desperation at not being able to find work in their field. Some of these may fear trying again to reach for their dreams as failing and disappointment hurts.If you have a steady job that allows you to get by, the possibility of failure doesn't seem worth making the effort.

Fear makes you comfortable with the status-quo and many often find themselves in dead end jobs. But handling disappointment and moving on is what will make or break the dream one once had.

I had imagined myself in a good steady job after college. But that hasn't been the case. I now find myself faced with a few important choices. Do I keep trying to pursue my dreams even though they don’t seem to be leading anywhere right now? Do I put my dreams on the shelf for a while and try something else? Do I give up and just drop my dreams completely?I think others face these same questions.

I've chosen to not give up my dream or giving in to the pressure that it needs to happen right now. In order to survive though, I will have to try something new and temporarily, or partially, put my dreams aside.

I like to see myself as a courageous person, not afraid of taking on new challenges. Hopefully I can prove to myself that I can end up where I imagined myself to be - at some time in the near future. Hard times breed inspiration I've heard.

You start with a rough sketch in the design process and often, when you're done, the finished product isn't even close to what you expected. You learn things along the way that affect and change what you’re working on. Your dream is like a rough sketch. The end product may be very different."

John Pugente,writing about the 16th century founder of the Jesuits, notes that St. Ignatius of Loyola "...had the insight that we all live in imagined worlds, and that our imagination constructs the worlds in which we live, using our experiences, our lived contexts, our hopes, our pains and our joys. In effect we live in a highly selective world, and this world defines what is possible for us. It also defines how we see ourselves, how we interact with others and the context in which we find ourselves." (1)

Imagining the future is an important aspect of student life. It is a way of giving form and definition to self identity. As our contributors have written, this imagining should be pursued with an understanding that dreams will be modified by experiences and contexts beyond life as a student.

I never explored becoming a concert pianist once I left that graduation ceremony. Instead, my interest lead me to study music composition for film. And slowly, my passion changed from music to filmmaking.

Yet even this new direction was modified when I was accepted for graduate study at the University of Southern California. I went to Los Angeles with thoughts of becoming a filmmaker. However, the scholarship I received was not in film, but in the related field of Instructional Technology. I took extensive course work in cinema but because of my scholarship I began to focus study on a career in the field of media and education.

I have considered the task of living to be much like that of weaving a tapestry. One brings together many threads of interests and experiences to create the unique fabric that forms one's life. My weaving together of interests in music,film,and media eventually formed a career. A career that I had not imagined as a student dreaming of performing with the great orchestras of the world.

Chris's observation about a dream being but a rough sketch is insightful. As we sketch a dream it will only be that - a sketch of possibilities. Many factors enter and change the dreamscape. Yet, as with Aaron, Chris and Nick, holding onto the dream, realizing it will change, is well worth the challenge.

Nick Falbo is a 3D Animator and Artist based in Portland,OR. He is currently animating creatures for an upcoming PC based role playing game to be released by Electronic Arts in the first half of 2004.

Aaron Graham is a Graphic Designer with Monaco Coach Corporation.

Chris Johannson is a Mortgage Loan Originator in Portland and web designer on the side.

Reference:(1) Pugente, John. "Pop goes the Saviour", The Toronto Star, February 28, 2004.

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